Sorry, I have to go to work……

” I have to go to work”

There, I said it. Along with “I can’t take your call, I have to work’.  These words,  although were my  ‘go-to’s’  in my old life, to say it today,  felt slightly off. For good reason.

I haven’t worked in 2 years at a regularly scheduled job.( It’s a long dramatic over-told  story, so to cut to the chase, I will skip it.)

I first want to acknowledge how  ironically  grateful I am for having this be my truth, it’s two years I wouldn’t trade for the world.

In that time, I have learned that  when you do not have to punch a time clock, life is easier.  It flows in unimaginable ways.  I can  try to spin it,  to make it feel better – but when you “have to go to work” unless you are loving what you are doing,  you are probably only  really  living your best  life outside of those hours. Which doesn’t leave a lot of time.  

So today when I said the words and I realized I had made a commitment to work for someone today, I took it for what it was.

Work.

Not my whole life, not my super passion, just work – My life coach calls it my side hustle.  That thing we do to pay the bills.   It is where I am of service to others and I get paid.  We don’t always love it,  but we endure to make other parts of our life available to us.

I have a really strong work ethic.  I am one who can sit 9 hrs straight and barely know its passed if I have a deadline to meet.

Great work quality, horrible “live your life as if ” quality.

The beauty of today is that because of those two years, I can handle it in a much different way. I know  me well enough inside now  to know what will or will not work for me and I can adjust accordingly.

I can set boundaries around my time and my days.

I can count the hours of work and the hours of play.

I can do this, I can do this………

In case you haven’t gathered by now- work scares the pants off me  (another part of the long story)  and I thought if I wrote this then maybe it would help  me with the impending  adjust to my 100% free lifestyle.  Maybe, I think,  it will help someone else in the process, and then I remember why I need the side hustle:

My passion is writing. Creating. Traveling.  Living life. Learning. Sharing joy. Inspiring. Playing. Cooking. Gardening. Laughing. Reading. Watching Movies and television.  Beaching. Dining. Concerts.  Just hanging with my  favorite peeps – I love my Pool-time & paddle -boarding at the Lake. I love the joy life brings when you let it.

Lots of good reasons to continue the side-hustle.  🙂

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